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I Left an Abusive and Controlling Husband and Now I’m Drowning in Debt. – Lynn

“Dear Steve,

I left an abusive/ controlling husband a few years ago with literally not a penny to my name. Because of shady practices on my ex’s part and a lawyer who did not serve me well, I ended up $5000 in debt right from the start with legal bills and a poor settlement.

In spite of working overtime as much as possible and trying to live frugally, I am now $10,000 in debt and barely keeping my head above water. I do not own my own home, I rent. I’ve been trying to recover from medical bills and have almost paid these all off. I am at a place where I make too much money to qualify for any types of assistance, but not enough to be financially free.

What advice do you have for me? What steps can I take to dig myself out of this debt? a few years ago with literally not a penny to my name. Because of shady practices on my ex’s part and a lawyer who did not serve me well, I ended up $5000 in debt right from the start with legal bills and a poor settlement. In spite of working overtime as much as possible and trying to live frugally, I am now $10,000 in debt and barely keeping my head above water.

What advice do you have for me? What steps can I take to dig myself out of this debt?

Lynn”

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The Answer

 

Dear Lynn,

Being in that widening chasm of the working poor is frustrating and hard to break free from. But let me congratulate you for the difficult steps you’ve taken to date. It took real guts to escape that abusive relationship and for that you should be proud.

Before you rush to any solution I first need to make sure your life can fit within your current income. Let’s say you pursued bankruptcy to get a fresh financial start and eliminate your past lingering debt, would your current income be enough to cover your current minimum life expenses of shelter, food, transportation, etc?

I’m concerned even without the debt you’d be living on the edge. Am I right or wrong?

Big Hug!

I Left an Abusive and Controlling Husband and Now Im Drowning in Debt.   Lynn
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I Left an Abusive and Controlling Husband and Now I'm Drowning in Debt. - Lynn by

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About Steve Rhode

Steve Rhode
Steve Rhode is the Get Out of Debt Guy and has been helping good people with bad debt problems since 1994. You can learn more about Steve, here.
  • Deborah

    Oh boy, if this doesn’t sound familiar, I would like to know why the government has not addressed the need for temp homes for women who have been abused emotionally and financially, I suppose, you must prove
    externally the scars that are left behind to get attention, I belong to Al-anon and meet with a therapist once a week, and I’m still trapped after many more abuses, since I gave him everything, have no job, because I feel incompetent, and have no where to run, what do people do when this happens, the shelter is terrifying to me, and causes me to have anxiety attacks, My god, the cycle never ends…

  • Deborah

    Oh boy, if this doesn’t sound familiar, I would like to know why the government has not addressed the need for temp homes for women who have been abused emotionally and financially, I suppose, you must prove
    externally the scars that are left behind to get attention, I belong to Al-anon and meet with a therapist once a week, and I’m still trapped after many more abuses, since I gave him everything, have no job, because I feel incompetent, and have no where to run, what do people do when this happens, the shelter is terrifying to me, and causes me to have anxiety attacks, My god, the cycle never ends…

  • Lynn

    Steve, thanks for your prompt reply. I truly hope that bankruptcy isn’t the only answer for me. If I were clear of my credit card debt, I could provide for my needs and put away money in savings with what I make now, even without the overtime hours. And quite honestly, I truly do want to pay back what I owe. It’s just so hard to do with the crazy high interest payments on that debt. I wish there were a way I could earn more money and pay it off.

    • http://GetOutOfDebt.org Steve Rhode

      Lynn,

      Bankruptcy is the only legal option that will stop the interest being charged and allow you a fresh start. You know, there is nothing that prevents you from getting the protection bankruptcy offer you and then repaying your creditors latter because you want to.

      Click here to find a local bankruptcy attorney you like. Make an appointment for a free consultation and go in and discuss your situation with the bankruptcy attorney. Then go home and think it over for a couple of days. Come back and update me on what you think about bankruptcy after learning all the facts for a bankruptcy lawyer licensed in your state.

      Most of the apprehension people have about bankruptcy are unfounded fears. Credit can be rebuilt, it does not prevent you from getting a job, and it is the quickest way to reboot your financial life and start again.

      Steve

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