Latest Posts
Home > Ask The Get Out of Debt Experts > My Parents Have to Help Me Pay My Debt. – Karen

My Parents Have to Help Me Pay My Debt. – Karen

“Dear Steve,

I have about $36000 of unsecured debt. I am able to make minimum monthly payments on my debts, but that is with my parents paying on one of my accounts for me. Also, I am continuing to use my credit cards for gas, groceries, prescriptions because the monthly payments take most of my income in addition to rent, insurance, utilities, etc. Lastly, I’ve borrowed a lot of money from my parents for a move this fall and am yet to pay any of that back. My parents are retired and on a fixed income. Though they are extremely generous and do not pressure me, I really want to pay them back soon. I am sick of the treadmill and want desperately to lift the burden from my parents and myself by consolidating my debt with a loan. I’m reliable, I can make a monthly loan payment without burden, and I have a credit score of 712.

I’ve read your article on debt consolidation loans and sadly discovered neither Lending Club or Prosper are lending to people in Maine, which is where I live. Any thoughts on other loan options?

Karen”

Don’t miss our free Get Out of Debt – “How To” Guide Series on a number of topics, for loads of practical advice, tips, and help to beat back debt. – Click Here

The Answer

Dear Karen,

I’m not aware of any other loan sources that are similar to lendingClub.com or Prosper.com that I would recommend.

Let me ask you a really tough question. And one I’d like for you to ponder on for 24 hours before answering me.

Do you feel it’s your responsibility to resolve this situation, no matter what, so your parents don’t have to help you make ends meet?

I’ll reserve any further comments till I hear back from you.

Please post your responses and follow-up messages to me on this in the comments section below.

Big Hug!

My Parents Have to Help Me Pay My Debt.   Karen
Get Out of Debt Guy – Twitter, G+, Facebook

If you have a credit or debt question you’d like to ask just use the online form. I’m happy to help you totally for free.

My Parents Have to Help Me Pay My Debt. - Karen by

Share This and Spread the Word

About Steve Rhode

Steve Rhode
Steve Rhode is the Get Out of Debt Guy and has been helping good people with bad debt problems since 1994. You can learn more about Steve, here.
  • Karen

    Hi Steve,
    In my hiatus from posting here, I’ve taken some big steps in the right direction. I’ve signed up on a DMP with Cambridge Credit Counseling. They were able to get my interest rates reduced to a place I can make a manageable monthly payment. This includes the account my parents were paying, which meets my goal of getting my debt off their plate. I paid off two smaller credit accounts with part of my tax refund. And, I’ve gotten a 2nd job that will hopefully help me build my savings. It is scary to be living with no credit cards, but I have to do it.

    On the student loans, I do not qualify for income based repayment. I think it would a good idea to consolidate all three loans into one. Any ideas for that?
    Thanks-
    Karen

    • http://GetOutOfDebt.org Steve Rhode

      Excellent news!

      Look at the Direct Loan consolidation program.

  • Karen

    Steve,
    Thanks for the tough question. I needed to think about that a lot. The answer is yes I feel responsible to do what it takes for my parents to stop helping me. At the same time, I will admit that “no matter what” makes me nervous. Clearly, my emotions are very wrapped up in this.
     
    Here’s some more about my situation. I moved to Maine in September for a job. I am making more money but also have increased expenses. I feel like I’m still getting used to my new finances. My company has been bought and in a few weeks we’ll be changing from getting paid every week to getting paid every 2 weeks. I also have student loans which are currently in forbearence. I am currently feeling overwhelmed and I’m honestly not sure if it’s because things are changing or because I’m really ready to make big changes. Trying to be honest here. Feeling overwhelmed had me researching and considering debt management or debt consolidation. I was leary of signing on with any particular company and after stumbling on your website I’m glad I haven’t taken that step.  
     
    I have started working on a detailed list of my expenses to figure out where all the money is going, how I can cut back, and how I can address my debt situation. I am also considering getting a second job. I appreciate any advice you have.
    Thanks-
    Karen

    • http://GetOutOfDebt.org Steve Rhode

      I appreciate your honesty and I know introspection is tough. Consider this a journey that will have a beneficial outcome for your life even though there might be some temporary pain in dealing with this.

      Nothing is on fire so we can afford to take this in logical steps. I’d like for you to track your spending, including your pocket cash for the next 30 days, Write down every penny you spend on a piece of paper and what it was generally for. The goal is to categorize what you spend your money on so you can decide if cutbacks are possible. At the same time, see if a second job is a possibility.

      Then I want you to come back and update me with the data and job chances. Deal?

      • Karen

        Deal :)  Get back to you in a month!Thanks-
        Karen

      • Karen

        Hello again Steve,
        I’ve been tracking every penny I spent for the past month. I just totaled it all up in categories and definately see some places I can cut back. I’ve also been on the lookout for 2nd job possibilities. Many part-time jobs available conflict with my full-time job as far as hours. I’ve considered the possibility of Avon or Mary Kay that would be more flexible. I also live in a beach community with a lot of seasonal business and hope jobs will open as those businesses reopen in the spring. I keep reminding myself what you said…that nothing is on fire and wrestling with my own wants. I welcome any input you have from here.
        Blessings-
        Karen

      • Karen

        Hello again Steve,
        I’ve been tracking every penny I spent for the past month. I just totaled it all up in categories and definately see some places I can cut back. I’ve also been on the lookout for 2nd job possibilities. Many part-time jobs available conflict with my full-time job as far as hours. I’ve considered the possibility of Avon or Mary Kay that would be more flexible. I also live in a beach community with a lot of seasonal business and hope jobs will open as those businesses reopen in the spring. I keep reminding myself what you said…that nothing is on fire and wrestling with my own wants. I welcome any input you have from here.
        Blessings-
        Karen

      • http://GetOutOfDebt.org Steve Rhode

        I hear you on the beach community issue. Yes, winter is dead but you are right, we do have spring to look forward to.

        Remember this isn’t a sprint but a slow and steady race. It’s going to take lots of purposeful steps, one in front of the other, to reach the end. What the end will be is yet to be determined.

        Now that you have a better grip on your income and expenses, how much money, after your living expenses do you have leftover for debt repayment?

        Also, do you know what your student loan payments will be when they start?

        Are they private student loans or government backed student loans?

        Steve

      • http://GetOutOfDebt.org Steve Rhode

        I hear you on the beach community issue. Yes, winter is dead but you are right, we do have spring to look forward to.

        Remember this isn’t a sprint but a slow and steady race. It’s going to take lots of purposeful steps, one in front of the other, to reach the end. What the end will be is yet to be determined.

        Now that you have a better grip on your income and expenses, how much money, after your living expenses do you have leftover for debt repayment?

        Also, do you know what your student loan payments will be when they start?

        Are they private student loans or government backed student loans?

        Steve

      • Karen

        I estimate $700/month available for debt repayment. My student loans are government backed. One from undergrad thru Direct Loans and the other for grad school thru Ed Financial. Both are in temporary hardship deferment…Ed thru May and DL thru Sept. The payments are $175 for Ed and $120 for DL…that’s what they were before I deferred again.

        Karen

      • http://GetOutOfDebt.org Steve Rhode

        Karen,

        Check the Income Based Repayment plan and let’s see what your payment would be under that very favorable government program. You can use the online tool here.

  • Karen

    Steve,
    Thanks for the tough question. I needed to think about that a lot. The answer is yes I feel responsible to do what it takes for my parents to stop helping me. At the same time, I will admit that “no matter what” makes me nervous. Clearly, my emotions are very wrapped up in this.
     
    Here’s some more about my situation. I moved to Maine in September for a job. I am making more money but also have increased expenses. I feel like I’m still getting used to my new finances. My company has been bought and in a few weeks we’ll be changing from getting paid every week to getting paid every 2 weeks. I also have student loans which are currently in forbearence. I am currently feeling overwhelmed and I’m honestly not sure if it’s because things are changing or because I’m really ready to make big changes. Trying to be honest here. Feeling overwhelmed had me researching and considering debt management or debt consolidation. I was leary of signing on with any particular company and after stumbling on your website I’m glad I haven’t taken that step.  
     
    I have started working on a detailed list of my expenses to figure out where all the money is going, how I can cut back, and how I can address my debt situation. I am also considering getting a second job. I appreciate any advice you have.
    Thanks-
    Karen

Get My FREE Get Out of Debt Guy Newsletter

It is the smart thing to do.

I promise to keep your email safe and secure.

Close

I want to keep you posted each weekday with just one email about the latest get out of debt news, scam alerts and information to beat back debt.

You can unsubscribe at any time with just one click.

After you subscribe, check your email to confirm your subscription. If the confirmation email does not appear in your inbox in a few minutes, check your spam folder for it. Sometimes it likes to annoyingly hide there.


  • It will keep you posted on the latest scams.
  • You will be alerted to the latest articles.
  • You will wind up smarter than everyone else dealing with debt.