“Dear Steve,

I am 66 married hubby is 55 & on disability – I have been fighting depression all my life – I work part time but hours are being cut – company may go under – no jobs out there for the elderly – we are $105,000.00 in debt of cc & loan- can’t pay them anymore – tried calling the cc & loan for a better repayment plan they were no help – seeing a lawyer about bankruptcy – I am getting calls fron a 800 # but when I answer no one is there so I hang up – I presume it is from the loan company – why can’t they just be on the other end – I will answer even though it does no good.

I am paying some of these bills even though it is a hardship should I just quit paying them all? Also should I tell them when they do call that I will be filing for bankruptcy?

I love your site & thank you for being such a caring person in this time of need

Janet”

The Answer:

Dear Janet,

I am so sorry that you are dealing with all of these issues. I guess I’ll have to fall back on my motto that gets me through these dark days, “At least you’re not on fire.”

I feel strongly that we need to tackle this in a bit of a reverse order. The financial issue is a symptom of a greater money troubles and yes, it can be address through bankruptcy. Click here for bankruptcy information.

But at the same time I think you need to focus on getting your depression under control. Depression and debt are not good friends. Living with active depression leaves you unable to properly deal with the strong emotional hurdles in your way that need your vigor and drive to get through.

For example, when you go bankrupt you are best served by embracing the task and working quickly to get all the necessary documentation to the attorney to file your bankruptcy papers. If you are suffering with the effects of depression it is hard to muster the energy to focus on the task of gathering documents or even getting it to the attorney.

If you are not under treatment for your depression I really want you to go and speak to your medical professional about how you are feeling. Depression can be placed under control with non-addictive medication and or talk therapy. For more information on depression please read this detailed publication National Institute of Mental Health – Depression

Symptoms of Depression

• Persistent sad, anxious or “empty” feelings
• Feelings of hopelessness and/or pessimism
• Feelings of guilt, worthlessness and/or helplessness
• Irritability, restlessness
• Loss of interest in activities or hobbies once pleasurable, including sex
• Fatigue and decreased energy
• Difficulty concentrating, remembering details and making decisions
• Insomnia, early-morning wakefulness, or excessive sleeping
• Overeating, or appetite loss
• Thoughts of suicide, suicide attempts
• Persistent aches or pains, headaches, cramps or digestive problems that do not ease even with treatment

As you can see those issues related to untreated depression are not conducive to helping you to deal with the financial trauma or moving forward with your life.

The calls you are getting sound like they are coming for a computer autodial system that automatically connects a debt collector with the next call when they have finished with the last. Sometimes the computer will dial the call and once it is answered, then connect it with the next available collector. It sounds like the nothingness you are hearing is that time lag between when you answer and when a human picks up.

If you do speak to a human you can tell them you are filing bankruptcy if you want, doesn’t hurt.

It does not make sense to continue to send any more payments to your creditors that will be included in your bankruptcy but you should coordinate which payments to stop with your bankruptcy attorney. They will be happy to advise you about this.

The sooner with meet with your bankruptcy attorney and get that process moving forward, the sooner the collection calls will cease and your debt will be put behind you so you can focus on living on what you are earning today rather than struggling to make yesterday’s ends meet with a salary based on the working conditions from tomorrow.

Big Hug!

@GetOutOfDebtGuy

The Answer:

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Read the full article at GetOutOfDebt.org, click here: Janet is Fighting Dark Depression, Debt, Disability and Despair

Since my financial failure and bankruptcy I have never taken for granted the difficult and painful process of living through and surviving money troubles. I’ve walked in your shoes. I know what it feels like. I’ve felt the pain and shed the tears. I’ve been afraid and I’ve been depressed.

And even though a lot of time has passed since my dark and stormy days of 1990, when I failed, I still think of those times and get up every day and wake my body for a new opportunity just to help you through your dark days.

Helping you, that I do for free. I do it because it is the right thing to do and I do it because I have been blessed with the skills and abilities to be able to help you when you need help most. My crushing failure as a provider for my wife and family and as a broken father for my young daughter in 1990 was not a death sentence for me because it gave me the experience to help you.

I can’t promise you a magic wand or to make your problems instantly go away, but what I can promise you is a deep and personal concern for you and the suffering you are going through. I promise to tell you the honest truth and provide guidance, advice and hugs to help you through your own dark days.

All I ask from you, is to trust me to ask me for help, to ask for advice, and to ask me to be there for you. I will not charge you a penny, there is no fee for my help and I do all of this for you, my brothers and sisters in debt, because I love you and I care about you, from the very bottom of my heart.

When my dying days arrive I want to look back and know that I made a difference in the lives of some because I cared about what needed to be done, for the right reasons and for the right people. If you are struggling with debt, you are afraid, you are uncertain about what to do, you need an ear to talk softly in and you need a strong hug to make it through tomorrow. I will be here for you.

/s/ Steve
Steve Rhode

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Read the full article at GetOutOfDebt.org, click here: A Pledge And Promise I Work Hard Every Day to Keep: To Be Here For You When You Need Me