How to Get Out of Debt With the Get Out of Debt Guy » fiancee

US Bank Credit Card Got a Judgment and Wage Garnishment on My Fiancee. –

Steve Rhode — Mon, 20 Jun 2011 19:18:00 +0000

“Dear Steve,

My fiance had an Old US Bank credit card debt of 6-7K. They have filed a judgment against her and now wage garnishment are in action. She was told 25% of her pay every week would be taken out.

Everything was going well, she got promoted at work, called creditors to take care of some old debt and everything was looking good until this hit. She calculated everything together and the wage garnishment would make her unable to pay most of her bills, including rent.

What can we do here? I am unable to help her due to my own debt issues as much as I want to help. We tried to get a loan but due to our credit it was unsuccessful. She is so stressed out because she can’t find any help, no family to help. I feel really bad because I am already running 2 jobs to take care of my own debt and theres nothing I can do to help her.

Tony”

The Answer:

Dear Tony,

The most logical solution here is pretty straightforward. Since the one creditor went for the wage garnishment it is unlikely they are going to stop the wage garnishment. They already managed to reach into her income. You could try to negotiate an elimination of the wage garnishment with the creditor and see if there isn’t a more affordable payment they’d agree to. That’s an incredible long shot if they did all of that.

The more realistic solution is going to be for her to go for a legal and financial fresh start. Consider it a second chance. If she filed bankruptcy it would kill the wage garnishment and probably discharge her other debts within months.

Before you make any choice of what to do here I’d suggest you click here to find a local bankruptcy attorney and go meet with them. Find out what bankruptcy would mean for her in her situation. A bankruptcy forced by a wage garnishment is not an uncommon occurrence.

Please post your responses and follow-up messages to me on this in the comments section below.

Big Hug!

@GetOutOfDebtGuy

If you have a credit or debt question you’d like to ask just use the online form. I’m happy to help you totally for free.

My Fiance Agreed to Pay Half of Everything. It Didn’t Work Out Like That. – Kimberly

Lewis Roberts — Thu, 12 May 2011 14:36:11 +0000

From How to Get Out of Debt

“Dear Lewis,

About three years ago I was living in a house with my fiancee and his grandparents. They had agreed to pay half of everything but to no avail they never paid a penny. I had to let me credit cards fall by the wayside so I could make sure I had a roof over my head, my car didn’t get repossessed, and that I had food to eat.

Once I let the credit cards go it was pretty easy to let the smaller debts go as well. No I have about $15,000 in debt that has been charged off on my credit. My credit score is pretty low around the 500′s and I currently only make $1800/month. I have two cars in my name, which I have never defaulted on or made a late payment on. All of my debt is credit cards, utility companies,apartment complexes, etc. I want to be able to buy a house soon because I am currently expecting my first child in August of this year.

Should I file bankruptcy? If I do which chapter? My car will be paid off on or before December of 2013 and I might need to trade it in before that. Will I be able too if I file bankruptcy? Will I be able to rent from apartment complexes? Any guidance would be helpful. Thank you!

Kimberly”

The Answer:

Dear Kimberly,

For many people, I would say that $15,000 is not enough debt to file bankruptcy. But that is the easy way out to answer someone. For some people $15,000 in debt is nothing, for others it can be a never ending battle.

With $1800/month income, and two car payments, without earning more money, you will never dig out of $15,000+ in debt.

I am not sure why you have two car payments? Why do you have two cars? Why not let one go? Many of my clients have been able to get a new car after filing bankruptcy. It won’t be a perfect interest rate, and it might not be a brand new car, but it is a great way to re-establish your credit after bankruptcy.

As to buying a home, I am afraid that might take a longer time. Your credit scores are pretty low, and a bankruptcy can show on your credit report for up to 10 years. The other large problem is: where will you get a down payment from? The banks are very tight these days, so getting a mortgage is near impossible with nothing down.

You may have to look to other ways of buying a home. Like renting to own, contract for deed, or agreement for deed (basically all are forms of owner financing – maybe someone owns two homes and needs to get one sold and is willing to carry their own mortgage). A strong word of caution on that course of action: make sure the owner/seller is not in financial trouble themselves; make sure they are not in foreclosure.

Lastly, if you need to rent for a while, my clients do not seem to have problems renting after bankruptcy (whether in an apartment complex or from an individual owner). I can only base this on the fact that my clients don’t call me back after their bankruptcy to tell me they are having trouble renting. I don’t hear from them, so I have to assume that is a form of positive feedback on their ability to find housing.

I hope this helps, and good luck!

My name is Lewis Roberts and I’m an attorney licensed in Florida and Georgia. My practice focus is consumer bankruptcy, real estate issues/closings, and mortgages. I also have Florida real estate broker and mortgage broker licenses. I am a proud member of the National Association of Consumer Bankruptcy Attorneys (NACBA), National Association of Consumer Attorneys (NACA), and a graduate of Max Gardner’s Bankruptcy Boot Camp. I enjoy helping people with decisions that impact their financial well-being.

Legal Disclaimer: This is for educational purposes only. It is not to be relied upon as legal advice. It also does not create an attorney-client relationship. No such relationship is formed with attorney without a written agreement.

If you have a bankruptcy question you’d like to ask just use the online form.

I’m Thinking of Calling of the Wedding Because I Don’t Want to Tell Him About My Debt.

Steve Rhode — Tue, 16 Mar 2010 21:15:03 +0000

From How to Get Out of Debt

“Dear Steve,

I am about to get married for the first time in about 6 months. I am scared of my debt and how it will effect my future husband (who happens to have a great credit score.) I have several debts to technical companies, one payday loan, and my very high and in collections student loans. I am at the brink of a breakdown. I don’t know where to turn or how to get out of the situation I am in and am considering calling off the wedding in fear that it will be detremental to my future busband and his financial stability. Please help! Where do I turn and will it effect my future husband and his ability to get a home/car loan or credit cards?”

The Answer:

There is no need to put off getting married. Love can conquer all but it must be built on a foundation of honesty.

I would suggest you get a copy of your consolidated credit report and sit him down in a nice way and tell him you want to share the reality of your financial woes.

Your debt will not become his debt upon marrying but your current issues may prevent you from applying for joint credit to buy some future items like a home or car.

If you love the guy, which I assume you do, then he deserves to know the truth. If he was a jerk and pitched a fit or left then he is honestly the guy you want to marry.

I often hear the comment that people feel scared and alone and don’t want to tell their future spouse about their debt issues but honestly, if you are intimate enough to have sex and want to enter into the legally binding relationship of marriage, you certainly need to be able to talk to each other about money, credit and debt.

Trust me, this will work out fine, just be open and honest about it right now.

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Big Hug!

@GetOutOfDebtGuy

If you have a credit or debt question you’d like to ask just use the online form. I’m happy to help you totally for free.

Will I Be Responsible for My Fiancees Debt When We Get Married? – Ken

Steve Rhode — Fri, 22 Jan 2010 22:39:35 +0000

From How to Get Out of Debt

“Dear Steve,

My fiancee has an outstanding loan with her ex-husband. When we get married, will I be financially/legally responsible for that loan?

Ken”

The Answer:

Dear Ken,

No.

The only way you would be “responsible” for it would be indirectly. Let’s say she brings this debt into the marriage and for her to be able to pay the debt it requires you to supplement her income to cover expenses. But that’s more of a esoteric discussion rather than reality. Almost no couple brings equal income into the marital partnership anyway.

The only way for you to get on the hook for this old debt would be if you cosigned or helped her to take out a loan to pay it off. Don’t do that. If you do, you have just fallen prey to sexually transmitted debt.

Big Hug!

@GetOutOfDebtGuy

I’m Getting Married But My Fiancee and I Don’t Seem to Be Money Compatible. – Sarah

Steve Rhode — Thu, 07 Jan 2010 18:37:15 +0000

From How to Get Out of Debt

“Dear Steve,

I am 27 years old and engaged. I spent significant money to fix up my house so I could sell it and move where my fiancee got a job. I also bought a new mattress in January 2008, consulting with the fiancee. I now owe (been paying stuff for a while) $4500 from the house repairs (house did sell though!) and $2300 on the mattress. I also have $15000 in student loans and $12000 in a car loan

My fiancee is debt free and has been very vocal about this. He had told me he would start helping me on the mattress and his version is now that we are together he has sent 1 payment total – although he may send another one next month? I feel that I would not have the remaining house debt if I had not had to sell the house in poor market and finance a move two state away.

We started a financial class and the first thing he tells me as we leave is that he felt silly because he is the only person who has no debt – translation he doesn’t consider any part of my debt (not even the mattress) to be a shared responsibility.

The wedding is 5 weeks away (we have paid cash for this) and we had planned to start setting up joint accounts, etc after the wedding.

I think since he does not feel responsible, then we should just keep separate until the debt he doesn’t want to pay is gone (which would be all of it). However I know this will only cause me to resent him as I had no unsecured debt prior to our deciding to purchase the mattress and then selling my home.

I’m concerned about fully joinging everything because neither of us wants to give up control regarding finances.

How/when should we combine finances?

Sarah”

The Answer:

Dear Sarah,

Congratulations on finding the love of your life and on the upcoming wedding.

I know you are a bit stressed about all of this right now, but let me know how you are feeling after you read what I have to say.

In relationships it seems like savers attract spenders. Your future husband sounds like he has exercised great self-control at avoiding financial liability but in fact, he has simply shifted it to you.

Situations like yours can be overcome but unless you address it, it will fester and become a source of future contention. Sarah, the key here is going to be communication.

You sound like you are making all the right decisions. I applaud your taking the financial class but his comments as you walk out of class just reinforce my feeling that he does not see that he has a joint debt with you for these items.

He needs to understand that as husband and wife, joined in marriage, you will have joint responsibilities and obligations. This is probably a good time to address these issues even though the wedding day has not arrived just yet.

Rather than giving up individual control, you need to help him understand that what you want to achieve is joint control. You want the two of you to actively participate in managing your finances and to both be aware of where you stand.

I would suggest that you start out proposing a friendly meeting where you each pull your consolidated credit report and sit down and read them together. Then swap them so you can read each others credit report. This consolidated credit report is the one I like the best and use.

The credit report review will give you both a background understanding about what credit history you are bringing into the marriage. This will be the best point to discuss that you are also bringing into the marriage these recent debts, the student loan and the car payment.

I know that some people feel that couples should keep separate finances, but I don’t. I think that just creates the fertile medium for financial secrets and I don’t like that.

I also think that if two people want to get married under law, roll around in the sack, swap bodily fluids and potentially create a baby together, then they need to be adult enough to manage their finances together as well.

Does that mean that at some point in the future you won’t get divorced or have marital problems? Absolutely not. But those problems are going to be over other things.

Sarah, you need to sit the lad down and do this right away. You need to have this conversation with him as soon as possible so you feel comfortable, compatible and treated fairly before you get married.

After you get married and combine joint accounts, maybe set one day a month as the day the two of you will sit down together and look at the bank account, bills and investments. Information creates power and communication eliminates secrets.

Big Hug!

@GetOutOfDebtGuy

How Can I Help My Husband Realize That We Need to Save Money? – Valerie

Steve Rhode — Thu, 31 Dec 2009 20:53:23 +0000

From How to Get Out of Debt

“Dear Steve,

My fiancee and I are getting married in a few days. We have a newborn on the way and are struggling to save up any money to buy furniture for this baby. We both have jobs and will both be keeping them throughout the marriage. However, going into this marriage he doesn’t save any money. He also has terrible credit. I save every penny I can and have a pretty good credit score. I know that money is one of the most common arguments in any married couple, but how do I get him to see that we really need to start focusing on this upcoming addition to the family instead of our growing DVD collection? I’ve brought it up to him before and he agrees, yet he hasn’t put any money into our savings account, while I’ve contributed over $400.

How can I help my fiancee realize that we need to save money without seeming like I don’t want him to spend anything?

Valerie”

The Answer:

Dear Valerie,

Congratulations on the upcoming wedding. I’m really glad you’ve contacted me to ask your question. It is something that I run into a lot.

When looking for a life partner I guess we tend to look for those things that compliment ourselves. We seem to look for those opposites in who we find exciting or attractive. In all of my years it seems that savers attract spenders. One answer is that spenders are often a bit more impulsive and spend money on the savers which is a new and different experience. That is wonderful when you are dating but when it comes time to shack up the finances, there can be problems.

The worst thing you could do right now is tell him he can’t spend money on things he wants. The better approach is to establish an open communication about money. If you can be intimate enough to make love to each other and in your case, have a baby together, your relationship should be intimate to talk about finances together.

I think the time has come for you to open a joint bank account and deposit both of your paychecks into it. You can manage the account and move money into savings to help achieve your financial goals. While you’ll probably assume most of the control over paying the bills and balancing the checkbook the two of you should sit down together every two weeks and review where your money is going so he can see it clearly. The last thing you want is for him to feel in the dark or that you are treating him like a child when it comes to where you combined money is going.

Together the two of you can determine how much can be spent on fun things like DVDs. Rather than tell him what he can spend his money on, basically you need to give him an allowance and let him determine how he is going to spend it. I’ll let you word that message in a loving way using your womanly charms to make him not feel like it is an allowance.

His poor spending and money management habits are the exact reason why he does not seem to have money and he has bad credit. You can nip this in the bud now.

If you sit down to have the conversation about putting all your money into one account that cares for the family and he has a problem with that, then you’ve got bigger issues. As a husband and a father he needs to understand that he now has a responsibility to earn, provide and financially care for his family. With the commitment of a wife and the care of a child comes the need to put away his childish wants for everything thing that has desired at an impulse.

The key to this approach is for you to encourage him to go out and blow his “allowance” in any way he wants. That is his money to spend without you looking over his shoulder. If you follow my advice then he won’t feel like he is being micromanaged to death by you, he’ll still have some discretionary financial freedom and you should be able to save for the both of you out of your combined money.

Big Hug!

@GetOutOfDebtGuy

My Fiancee And an Ex Had a Joint Account at a Furniture Store. This Doesn’t End Well. – Noname

Steve Rhode — Mon, 08 Jun 2009 13:05:45 +0000

From How to Get Out of Debt

Noname

“Dear Steve,

My fiancee and an ex had a joint account at a furniture store. When they split she forgot to remove him from the account and he ran up a 15,000 bill. The company has now put a judgement and garnishment against her for the full amount because they can’t find the guy. Any ideas

How do we get her clear of the debt. She didn’t know he used the account and they didn’t tell her he used it.

Noname”

The Answer:

Dear Noname,

The obvious problem is that there was a joint line of credit out there that was not closed and the dude went out and ran up the debt and then split. That leaves your fiancee on the hook as a joint account holder.

If she had notified the furniture store to close the account, and it had a zero balance, they should have, or at least removed her. That doesn’t sound like what happened here.

I think you’ll have to hire a local attorney and she will have to file suit against him for the money. Out of curiosity, were the monthly statements on this account being sent to her address or one she used to live at.

Big Hug!

@GetOutOfDebtGuy

Jessica is Engaged, in Debt, and Broke But Wants Big Wedding

Steve Rhode — Tue, 09 Dec 2008 17:46:00 +0000

From How to Get Out of Debt

“Dear Steve,

I am 25 years old, pretty deep in debt, and engaged to be married. My fiancee, who I’ve been with for just over 7 years now, was gracious enough to tell me we could get married whenever I was ready. Now the problem – my debt. My debt currently consists of the following:

$15,837 auto loan @ 8.99% (54 payments left at $356.10/month, had to refinance to a 72-month loan last year after a financial disaster). I refuse to give up this car, it’s all I’ve ever wanted in a car. I will probably drive it until it dies on me.

$14,782.21 in a personal line of credit @ 11.99%. With the current payment of $355.83, this loan has about 53 payments left. This was the result of consolidating credit card debts that at the time all cards had interest rates of over 18%. I can live with this loan as is, but would like to see it paid off sooner.

As of January, thanks to overtime and my anticipated tax refund check, two of my three credit cards will be paid off, leaving a final credit card debt of roughly $8,325 @ 6.99% interest.

On top of my debt, I have no savings – Only $5, enough to keep my accounts open with my bank (I switched to a credit union, LOVE them). And I’m trying to pay as much off as possible so I can pay for my wedding 2 years from now. My parents can’t afford to contribute at all.

My general question is, what is the best plan to pay off both my last credit card and my personal loan, providing the most space in credit to use for my wedding at the lowest interest rate? Should I focus on paying off the personal line of credit, making as much room as possible at a locked-in interest rate? Should I focus on the credit card to help improve my debt-to-credit ratio further and have more space available on my lower-rate source? Or should I split my available payments between the two? And amidst all this, with the current crisis, would it be a good idea to try sometime late next year (about the time I start my wedding planning) to refinance the line of credit to a lower rate with shorter payment terms?

I appreciate your help.

Jessica”

The Answer:

Dear Jessica,

I can’t help but ask you if the need to reorganize your debt to go back in debt for the wedding isn’t something that you are trying to rationalize for emotional reasons rather than for your financial health.

The debts you have listed seem to be the result of not getting out of debt to begin with, but shuffling debts around. Would it not make more sense to start a new life together with a firmer financial foundation rather than an expensive day?

Believe me, I get the point of having that special day. The lifelong dream of the perfect wedding, the special dress and that special moment. I understand that these issues are emotionally charged and I’m used to hearing “But you don’t understand”, but I do.

You’ve written to me for my opinion, so here it is, scale the wedding plans way back right now to what you can afford to pay for without going further in debt. Is it him that you want, or the party?

Millions of people get married each year in simple ceremonies that do not cost a lot. They have receptions in cafeterias and homes of friends. They get married on what they can afford to spend to accomplish the goal of being united in marriage, not throwing the best party.

Jessica, you are in debt and broke. technically you are insolvent, with your liabilities exceeding your assets. If this is the guy for you, get married and when you can both save the cash and afford to pay for a bigger affair, do it latter. Besides, it is grossly unsafe for you to not have any cash in the bank in a savings account.

You don’t need to spend tens of thousands to be in love and want to spend your life together. Don’t start married life saddled in debt if you don’t have to.

I am sorry if these are not the words you wanted to hear from me, but they are honest words, from someone that does care. And by the way, if you want, I can perform the wedding ceremony for free as the officiant. I can do that in many states.

Big Hug!

@GetOutOfDebtGuy

The Answer:

John is Worried His Debt Will Scare Away His Fiancee

Steve Rhode — Fri, 21 Nov 2008 16:14:12 +0000

From How to Get Out of Debt

“Dear Steve,

Here is the situation.

I have 50K of debt between credit cards and lines of credit and a 20k vehicle loan.

When I first met my fiancee, she asked about credit card debt, I was defensive about it so i just told her that i didn’t have any.

She knew I had a truck loan at the time. Then I sold a house and got 35k and spent the money on repaying some of my debt. she kept pressing me to pay off the vehicle instead so I told her that I did. So now I have the credit card debt and the truck loan and she thinks I have neither.

I have created a plan to slowly pay off the credit card debt and the vehicle loan is on monthly payments I always make.

I don’t know what to do, I never wanted to be in a position like this?

I feel if i tell her about all my debt it would crush her.

John”

The Answer:

Dear John,

It’s not the debt that would crush her, it’s your string of financial lies. Stop lying to her. If you truly love her, she deserves the honest truth from you about your situation. Otherwise there is no other way to look at the situation latter as an intentional deception and financial infidelity on your part.

And as much as you may want to keep this a secret, it can come out and the most inopportune time. At some point in the future you may apply for credit together and she may see your credit report and then what, an explosion.

I’ve watched good guys lose the love of their life simply because they were afraid to be open and honest about their financial situation. If you can be intimate in bed and with your love, you can be intimate about the reality of your debt.

My suggestion, order a copy of your consolidated credit report using this link. You’ll be able to print it out right away. Then, as difficult and uncomfortable as it might be for you, talk softly to her and tell her you have some important information that you want to share with her because you trust and love her and want her to be your wife, forever.

Then confess the truth and show her the credit report so she can see that you are telling her the full truth. Having a bottle of wine around to share during this conversation, doesn’t hurt.

A marriage or relationship built on truth is better than one set on a shifting pile of sand and lies.

Things might get frosty for a couple of weeks but in the end she will trust you more, respect you more and it will work out much better.

Big Hug!

@GetOutOfDebtGuy

The Answer:

Chris is in College With His Soon to be Wife And Slipping Below The Waves in Debt

Steve Rhode — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 22:27:02 +0000

From How to Get Out of Debt

“Dear Steve,

Me and my fiancee are in college my fourth year, her third and because I went without a job for about 8 months we encoured almost 10 grand in debt. Now that we are both working and trying to do the right thing we are slipping farther and farther into trouble and we no longer use any of the cards

Is there any government programs and grants for people like us , I also wonder about that bailout and if that could help us out at all?

Chris”

The Answer:

Dear Chris,

I get so many inquiries about government program, government grants and bailout money to pay off credit cards that I’d rip my hair out if I wasn’t bald already.

The problem with the belief in government grants and free money being available to help people in trouble, like you and your fiancee, is that a bailout program sounds almost like something that could be offered. It’s not.

There is no government program to pay of your debt, no bailout money to help you pay your bills and no free money from government grants to eliminate your credit cards. It is a myth.

I’m afraid the real way out of this is hard work and if that does not work, consider a debt management program, and if that does not work for you, then bankruptcy.

Big Hug!

@GetOutOfDebtGuy

How to Get Out of Debt With the Get Out of Debt Guy » fiancee

US Bank Credit Card Got a Judgment and Wage Garnishment on My Fiancee. –

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