TABLE OF CONTENTS

Chapter 1 – I Got Hit in the Head With a Baseball and I Saw it Coming
Chapter 2 – What Your Money is Trying to Tell You
Chapter 3 – Take a Lap on the Gerbil Wheel of Debt
Chapter 4 – Why Money Doesn’t Make You Happy
Chapter 5 – If You Had a Million Rats, Would You be Successful?
Chapter 6 – The 10 Attributes of Internal Prosperity
Chapter 7 – The Attributes of Internal Prosperity in Action
Chapter 8 – Your Money is Your Friend
Conclusion – Listen to Your Heart

Chapter 4 – Why Money Doesn’t Make You Happy

If you’ve nodded your head a few times reading the first three chapters of this book, get ready: I’m going to introduce you to a program which, if you stick to it, will help you to be happy and have money.

First, consider that part of what has been blocking your path to happiness and wealth is a pretty powerful set of perceptions that, if you don’t shake them, will bog you down and make you unhappy. In America, a major underlying perception appears to be that people with a lot of money are happy and fulfilled. The perception of money is “if only.”

If only I had more money, my life would be more fun. If only I had more money, I would be happier. If only we had more money, our relationship would be better.

Education is not necessarily the ticket out of the swamp created by the perceptions I just described. Have you ever been taught at home or at school how to manage money?

So many people hang their hat on financial education as a treatment for consumer credit and debt problems. People also believe that if only they had learned about finances in school they wouldn’t be in a jam today. They believe they are victims of the educational system, victims of their creditors and victims of life. In fact, even if they had been taught, they probably would not be better off financially because what most people are taught is how to be a money technician, not a money steward.

Many people believe that simply because they are aware of where their money goes, that they really understand the impact money has on their life, both good and bad. This is incorrect.

A money technician is someone who does a great job of balancing the checkbook.

They giggle the day they open the mailbox to find last month’s bank statement has arrived. They bound back to the front door and then leap down the stairs to the family room where the computer is located. The electronic brain is powered up with that comfortable hum, and the latest money program is double-clicked on the desktop to
launch Family Money Central. A quick insertion of fresh data into the money tracking software for the family’s money supply and, ta-da, everything is in balance and life is good. Ahh.

People who earn money are not necessarily good money stewards, and they certainly are not necessarily in touch with the motivations behind how they spend their money.

They just know exactly what the account balances are. Over the years I’ve had many clients who were super-organized, good technicians with all of their data, color-coded in binders. Many still experienced money troubles and general financial dysfunction. Some were even true money addicts, addicted to the pursuit of things they believed money would bring them.

Good money stewards are hard to find. They work their money so it yields the most benefit for them. They are conservative with it, and then, sometimes they aren’t. They meet their current obligations, they set aside a little in liquid cash, put some in longer term investments, and have fun with the rest. Their life is not always in balance but it’s like a plate spinning slowly on the tip of a stick, it wobbles a bit back and forth but it never falls off.

Good money stewards have laid the foundation for enjoying life and their money at the same time. You are going to learn those skills in this book.

For the vast majority of people, perceptions rather than reality drive their actions. I mean, does anybody really know what time it is? It is only the time it is right now because we say it is this time. We really don’t know what reality is because reality is only our perception of what we believe to be real.

If you throw 10 people on the same street corner and play out some event in front of them, you will hear 10 different versions of the same event. It’s not that any of them are wrong about what they report. What they tell you is the truth as far as they are aware. But is it the absolute truth? Probably not.

PERCEPTION BECOMES REALITY AND REALITY BECOMES TRUTH

For most people, money alone does not achieve any of the goals we desire besides having the money. Wealth is nothing more than the accumulation of material possessions or things we mutually agree are valuable. They
only have value because we perceive them to be valuable. Take a diamond for example; it’s a rock, for crying out loud. It’s only valuable because we perceive it to be valuable and others have told us it is valuable. In some parts of the world, you can find them lying right on the ground. There is even a state park in Arkansas where you can go and find diamonds lying right on the ground.

While the secret to happiness is always assumed to be wealth, wealth is just an external condition. The key to happiness is developing your character to the point where you achieve internal prosperity — and internal prosperity is free. You don’t need a bunch of money to have it right now, and you have no excuse for not getting up and getting it.

Once you begin your trip down the path of achieving internal prosperity, you will find that the money you make will slowly switch from not being enough, to more than you really need. It’s a magic transformation and it will change your life forever, or at least until you get out of balance and fall down. The good news is that you can get up again.

If you are wealthy without internal prosperity, what you have done is accumulated a lot of stuff that you now have to watch out for, worry about, insure, take care of and manage. A lot of stuff can bring us only fleeting joy and quickly becomes a burden.

Think about it: the more you accumulate, the harder you have to work to maintain it. There is a point where you don’t own your stuff, it owns you.

Examine for a moment these common items that give others the perception of wealth:

HOMES

Perception: They must be doing really well because they just bought a big home in that exclusive neighborhood.

Reality: Just because a lender was willing to risk giving them a huge mortgage does not mean they have a lot of money and it certainly does not mean they are happy. I’ve got some ex-neighbors to prove that. They seemed to have so many issues. On nightly walks, they’d always look down and never make eye contact as they passed folks on the sidewalk. They never mowed their lawn, hid in their house, were mean and grumpy almost all the time and I don’t think I ever saw friends over. If they had friends, I think they were the lawyers they were paying to sue everybody else.

Anyway, the reality of big homes is that what you perceive as success is really just a lot of debt. The new fancy home will get old, need constant upkeep to keep it looking respectable and soon will be in the “old” neighborhood. What begins as a “look where we live” will soon become a hole in the ground into which you pour money. Nice homes require landscaping, cleaning and maintenance. The bigger the house, the more of your income is going to be required to be able to properly maintain it.

CARS

Perception: Did you see their new car? They just bought a car that will always be valet-parked right in front of the restaurant so the restaurant can look good! It’s very expensive. They must be doing well.

Reality: First, they may not have purchased it at all. They may have just rented (leased) it. Even if they did buy it, it’s probably owned by the bank and has a big loan on it. You know, they make new models every year and what was hot and sporty this year is next year’s used car, so it will have to be replaced with the latest model. In a year or so they will have to sell, trade in or lease up to maintain the image. That move will cost them a lot of money, and deeper into debt they go.

INTERNAL PROSPERITY IS NOT AN ACCIDENT, WEALTH CAN BE

I recognize that there are plenty of happy rich folks, but what makes them fulfilled is that they are both internally prosperous and externally wealthy. But the majority of people try to start the trip to fulfillment with only half a tank.

I grew up in a fairly wealthy area. Early on, I observed that basically there are three types of people who live there. There are those who have little external wealth, these are usually the folks who lived in the area before it became trendy.

There are those who flaunt what they want you to think they have. These are the folks who look and smell good, but once you get past the front door you see the truth. The homes often have fabulous window treatments or “curtains of wealth,” but they only have enough furniture for a couple of poorly decorated rooms. Sometimes, they even sleep on lawn chairs. I was in one house that has almost all marble floors on the first floor, and the only stuff around is a television sitting on the floor in the living room, a glass table in the dining room and a couple of stools at the counter in the kitchen. I had to almost talk in a whisper because the echo was so bad. I’m serious.

These are the same people who drive their incredibly expensive cars to the supermarket, take your parking spot and cut you off in the food aisles with their cart as they block the frozen food aisle and hiss to themselves, “That’s my frozen quiche.”

One day at the market, I was standing next to a middle-aged woman dripping in furs and gold as she opened all the different types of mayonnaise. She would dip her little finger in, taste it and then put the top back on it and plop it back onto the shelf. She used the same finger for each new jar she cracked open. When she found the one she wanted, she put it in her cart and went on her way. What makes her think that is acceptable? With all her money, she couldn’t buy class. Another time, a guy walked up next to me and was tearing plastic bags off in the produce aisle and throwing them on the fruit displays and on the floor. I watched him for a minute. I didn’t have much choice because, I mean, I was standing right there next to him and could not reach what I wanted because he kept lunging across in front of me to tear off the next bag.

I finally figured out what he was doing. OK, sometimes those bags are a bit tricky to get open, but you’ve got to at least make an effort. He wasn’t even trying to open them. I guess he felt entitled to have the bag magically open for him. I said to him as he walked away, “Excuse me, you are not seriously leaving your trash all over are you?” He gave me an angry stare and then in a huff, picked up the bags and threw them in his cart. As he began to walk away again I said, “Excuse me.” He turned back, maybe hoping I would thank him. “You forgot one.” He did not pick it up. I’m almost positive that he left all the plastic bags in his cart and as he jumped into his Jaguar, pushed the cart into someone else’s car and as the wind whipped the bags into the air, he muttered to himself, “Look at all this trash.”

I’m convinced that these folks act this way because they feel that somehow money makes them more important and entitled to a certain life. They want to be treated with importance because of their illusion of wealth. They do not realize that if they were just internally prosperous people, many people would still be their real friends and treat them with kindness. They are so rich but so bitter and angry, it is sad to watch. Is that really how you want to live your life?

My favorite wealthy folks are the ones who are stinking rich but you’d never know it. This is the family who could be from anywhere and is blessed with incredible good fortune. They are typically kind and unassuming but take awesome vacations. They have arrived in money nirvana: internal prosperity and external wealth. Together. Amen.

Internal prosperity is the cornerstone of happiness, and it is right at hand. It’s virtually free and the tools we need to achieve it are within us or all around us. It’s up to us to gather them together and put them to use.

Prosperity and wealth do not breed constant happiness. If you are constantly or perpetually happy, you are probably on drugs and have broken with reality. The perception that money will bring happiness is a myth, an illusion, a lie. No matter how prosperous or wealthy you are, you will still have periods of unhappiness. In order to perceive that you have and will lead a happy life, you have to believe that you have had and will have more happy moments than sad moments.

LIFE PERCEPTIONS:

• I’m entitled…
• I deserve…
• Life owes me…
• I’ve earned it so it’s mine.
• I’m more important than you because I have money.
• I’m happier than you because I am wealthy.

LIFE REALITIES:

• You never know when you will die.
• You never know when you will be in pain.
• You never know…
• Life has no guarantees.
• Life owes you nothing.
• You are lucky to be alive because the only other option is to be dead.
• Comfort is a luxury.
• Before you can be truly happy with your wealth, you must be internally prosperous. Prosperity is the foundation for a happy and rewarding life. Prosperity is not about dollars. It’s about sense.
• Internal prosperity is an ongoing process. It’s not something that you achieve and then keep for the rest of your life. You have to work on it daily. It wouldn’t be precious if you didn’t have to work to maintain it.

EXERCISE

Distill Your Life

It’s not hard to make a still. I made one for a junior high school science fair project. I demonstrated how you could distill regular cooking sherry into a highly concentrated alcohol. It was very popular with the parents. I had a big crowd of adults waiting for samples.

You can do the same thing with your life. Distill the critical components of your life. Picture the three most important things in your life that you can’t live without. If some of your things are material possessions, they all have to fit into a backpack. So what are your three things, and what’s in your backpack? Why?

Next

Chapter 5 – If You Had a Million Rats, Would You be Successful?

Other Related Articles to Read

• Chapter 2 – What Your Money is Trying to Tell You
• Chapter 5 – If You Had a Million Rats, Would You be Successful?
• Chapter 6 – The 10 Attributes of Internal Prosperity
• Chapter 8 – Your Money is Your Friend
• The Exploding Income Gap
• Financial Literacy For Kids: How To Really Teach Kids How To Manage Money
• Chapter 1 – I Got Hit in the Head With a Baseball and I Saw it Coming
• Chapter 3 – Take a Lap on the Gerbil Wheel of Debt
• Chapter 7 – The Attributes of Internal Prosperity in Action
• Financial Literacy is Not a Vaccine, nor is it a Solution. It is an Excuse.

Read the full article at GetOutOfDebt.org, click here: Chapter 4 – Why Money Doesn’t Make You Happy

Jeanette

“Dear Steve,

I have used my home as an ATM machine to put 2 kids and myself through college.

We have a primary mortgage at 6% and a home equity loan at 8% both at a fixed rate (total loan amount $250,000.00). January 2008 our home appraised at $310,000.00.

Problem, we have one hundred thousand dollars in credit card debt. Just writing this brings tears to my eyes because I still cannot believe the mess that I have gotten myself in. I have always taken such great pride in our credit and have worked very hard to make sure that all our bills were payed on time but despite all of that I have seen our credit score drop from 730 to 630 because of our debt to income ratio.

There was a time when lending institutions and credit card companies were begging us to take their money. Now they have raised our interest rates, reduced our available credit and raised our minimum payments!

I am drowning in a sea of debt.

The minimum payments on all the credit cards and personal loans are approximately $4500.00 and my 2 mortgage payments total $2700.00. I have been working a lot of overtime to make sure that our net income is $8000.00 per month to cover the bills but each month it is getting harder and harder.

I don’t know what to do. My first mortgage company suggested “off the record” to consult with a debt settlement agency to get out from all this credit card debt and another person told me to try to refinance again. I found myself at google punching in the words “get out of debt” and found you. I have found some comfort in reading your posts and I know that I am not alone but I still need some advice.

Overwhelmed in New England!

Jeanniette”

The Answer:

Dear Jeanniette,

I wish I was there to wipe away the tears. The pain and sadness created by too much debt is almost the inverse of the fun and enjoyment that is created from spending the money.

What concerns me is that your ability to make it from month-to-month is dependent on overtime. I certainly applaud your work ethic but I can clearly see what would happen to your efforts if overtime was cut. And since overtime is optional and not guaranteed, basing continued obligations or a repayment strategy on overtime can be financial suicide.

With so much credit card debt I would assume that it is spread out over a number of credit cards. The thought of you being able to manage a “total solution” that worked for you with a number of different entities is doubtful. And even if you went with a credit counseling or debt management approach, I think it still leaves you dependent on overtime to make the payments.

I think the more logical approach at this point is to consult with a local bankruptcy attorney. Most offer a free bankruptcy consultation so it won’t cost you anything to go and talk, just talk. The only legal tool you have to reorganize your debt will be through bankruptcy. In a chapter 13 bankruptcy you can keep your home and the other debts reduced to a level that you can afford.

If you could refinance again, that might be an option for you. But with a current credit score of 630 I doubt that in the current market that you would be able to lower your overall rate much and even then you would securing unsecured debt against the house.

I know those tears of yours are tears of pain and that this path will be emotionally painful as well, but painful does not mean wrong.

Big Hug!

@GetOutOfDebtGuy

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• Holy Fraud, Batman! Literally…

Read the full article at GetOutOfDebt.org, click here: I’ve Been Using My House as an ATM Machine. – Jeannette

Doug

“Dear Steve,

I have 20k of ccard debt and have lost my job. I am paying my bills with unemployment and savings but time is running out. I have thought about Bankruptcy but have been told i will lose my boat which is paid for and the court might auction my home also. My house is paid for also

What would be my best solution to my problem?

Doug”

The Answer:

Dear Doug,

You certainly are in a jam. It is true that both the boat and house are valuable assets and could be sold. Using your savings to tread water is a limited game. When the savings run out, if the income problem is not resolved by then, you seriously risk losing the boat and the house.

I think the best course of action at this point is to draw a line in the sand, say six weeks from now. If you have not secured new income by that date then you will need to think about selling either your boat or your house to pay off your debts. If you can sell one and raise enough money to pay off the debts you can save the other.

I realize that might be like trying to chose which child is your favorite but better to save one than lose both.

Check back in and post an update in the comments section. let me know what you decide to do.

Big Hug!

@GetOutOfDebtGuy

Other Related Articles to Read

• We’ve Been Downsized Into a Financial Disaster. – Annie
• Saving Money is Important When Getting Out of Debt
• All About Chapter 7 Bankruptcy Rules
• I’m So Embarrassed About My Financial Situation. – Frances
• Is Bank Of America Taking Advantage Of The Unemployed With Debit Card Fees?
• Economic Birth Control : Steady Decline In Births Since Start Of Recession
• Federal Government Job Scam Halted
• Alleged Obstruction Of Justice Of Attorney And Client In $188 Million Fraud
• Unstructured “Structuring” Scam
• Root Canals and Appendectomy Were Expensive and Landed Me in Bankruptcy. – Ray

Read the full article at GetOutOfDebt.org, click here: I Don’t Want to Lose My Boat or Home. – Doug

Tony

“Dear Steve,

I dont understand what you are wanting to know on this.

Ok short story im buying a house. The title company tells me there is a judgement against me the judgement was put on Nov 30 1999 so i called the company they have no clue what Im talking about and im not in collections. I live in washington state from what I have read about the statue of limitations i beat this. Am I right and if so how do I get this judgement off record?

Tony”

The Answer:

Dear Tony,

You’ll need to go to the source. Get a recent copy of your credit report. On your credit report it will typically list the court case and cort where the judgment against you was obtained. Armed with that information you should contact the court and purchase a copy of the case records.

Those records will tell you exactly who was awarded the judgment against you and you can then contact them to either pay the judgment or get a letter from them saying the judgment was satisfied.

Steve

Other Related Articles to Read

• Talk Show Host And Financial Advisor Sentenced For Ponzi Scheme
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• Now That I’m on Social Security Disability Can I Stop Paying My Judgment? – Wendy
• Where Do I Put My Judgment in Line For My Debt Snowball? – Bret
• Fraudulent Rescue / Equity Skim Scheme Costs Dozens Over $6.2 Million
• I Have a Lot of Credit Card Debt, a Repossession and a Judgment. – Eric
• First Ever Central Florida Law Firm To Be Forced To Resign From BBB
• I Have an Old Judgment Against Me That Has Come Back Up. – James

Read the full article at GetOutOfDebt.org, click here: I’m Trying to Buy a House But I Have a Judgment Against Me. – Tony

Attorney General Bill McCollum announced this month that his office is investigating the unregulated debt relief industry. Until he can persuade lawmakers to impose rules, McCollum hopes lawsuits his office has filed and its investigations “send a message to this industry that preying on consumers in financial distress will not be tolerated,” according to an Oct. 15 statement.

The Attorney General’s Office has filed five lawsuits and is reviewing or investigating more than 30 others, including one involving Outreach Housing LLC, a Broward County company that does business in Palm Beach County.

More than 100 of the 600 homeowners who filed complaints said Outreach Housing told them to make a partial mortgage payment of 60 percent to the company, which would work with lenders to reduce their mortgage debts. The company failed to do so, according to the Attorney General’s Office.

That scheme is typical of debt relief fraud. The solicitations come in the mail, appear in newspapers and on the Internet, at bus stops and, most frequently, in telephone calls to a debtor’s home. The company offers to reduce interest rates, modify loans, set up reduced payment plans or settle debts for pennies on the dollar.

Clients are charged hefty upfront and monthly fees and told to stop making payments to creditors and instead send the payment to the debt relief company. Few or no payments or negotiations occur and clients are left with more debt, damaged credit and, often, higher tax bills.

Claims of debt fraud soaring Palm Beach Post,  United States - 2 hours ago As for her credit card debt , the company "made a couple of calls" and came back to her with a proposal to make a reduced, lump-sum payment of $5000 – an …

Click Here for Credit Card Debt Help

Source: Claims of debt fraud soaring – Palm Beach Post

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• Living (too) Large?
• Bailout Plan Wants to Push More Credit On Overloaded Consumers
• Expect Tidal Wave Of Limit Reductions and Credit Card Closures to Hit Before Christmas
• Debt Settlement: Top Ten Most Misunderstood Facts
• How to Avoid Filing for Bankruptcy – WAAY
• How to Avoid Filing for Bankruptcy – Wflxfox29.com
• Searching For a Debt Consolidation Loan or Credit Card Counseling Service
• Bankruptcy – Latest Bankruptcy News – Bankruptcy
• Raleigh Native Indicted In Connection With Fraud And Extortion
• Six Hundred Out Of $74 Million In Ponzi Scheme

Read the full article at GetOutOfDebt.org, click here: Claims of Fraud by Debt Relief Companies Soaring

The average client who seeks help at the Consumer Credit Counseling Service of Central New York has $47,000 in credit card debt and makes $37,000 a year.

Not surprising, considering that living expenses are going up while wages aren’t rising to match.

“Living expenses have jumped significantly, and people’s income hasn’t kept up,” said Karyn Dettbarn, the credit counseling company’s Albany branch manager. “People are using their credit cards to pay for their expenses.”

Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke suggested on Monday that a new economic stimulus package should include increased access to credit for consumers, home buyers and other borrowers.

So we already have consumers that are overloaded with credit and the governments answer to the economic crisis is to make it easier for consumers to get more credit?

Bailout plan to perpetuate our house of cards Times Herald-Record, NY - 56 minutes ago By Christian Livermore The average client who seeks help at the Consumer Credit Counseling Service of Central New York has $47000 in credit card debt and …

Click Here for Credit Card Debt Help

Source: Bailout plan to perpetuate our house of cards – Times Herald-Record

Other Related Articles to Read

• Claims of Fraud by Debt Relief Companies Soaring
• Living (too) Large?
• Expect Tidal Wave Of Limit Reductions and Credit Card Closures to Hit Before Christmas
• Business Noticing Increase in Credit Card Purchases. Not a Good Sign.
• Credit cards face bad debt
• In this economy, layaway is in vogue
• Elaborate Scheme Leaves 180 With Over $1 Million In Fraudulent Purchases
• Be Smart and Find the Best Credit Card That’s Right for You
• New Computer Virus Commits Post Transaction Attacks On Your Bank Account
• FTC Bans Landmark Clearing From Using Remotely Created Payment Orders

Read the full article at GetOutOfDebt.org, click here: Bailout Plan Wants to Push More Credit On Overloaded Consumers

A study by the Homeownership Preservation Foundation found that 43 percent of American households spend more than what they earn annually.

Living (too) large? Lancaster Newspapers, PA - 2 hours ago The average American household carries a credit card debt of more than $8000. According to The New York Times, as household debt has mounted, incomes have …

Click Here for Credit Card Debt Help

Source: Living (too) large? – Lancaster Newspapers

Other Related Articles to Read

• Claims of Fraud by Debt Relief Companies Soaring
• Bailout Plan Wants to Push More Credit On Overloaded Consumers
• Expect Tidal Wave Of Limit Reductions and Credit Card Closures to Hit Before Christmas
• Business Noticing Increase in Credit Card Purchases. Not a Good Sign.
• Redefining the American Dream
• Europe puts tight controls on £4bn bank offer
• Credit cards face bad debt
• In this economy, layaway is in vogue
• Searching For a Debt Consolidation Loan or Credit Card Counseling Service
• Elaborate Scheme Leaves 180 With Over $1 Million In Fraudulent Purchases

Read the full article at GetOutOfDebt.org, click here: Living (too) Large?