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We Are in Debt. My Husband Doesn’t Want to Do Anything to Hurt Our Credit. – Joy

“Dear Steve,

we are about $25,000 in credit card debt. My husband does not want to do anything that will hurt our credit. I on the other hand don’t know how to not ask. I see no end in sight. We have three children. One of which was born two months early and was in hospital for a while, she is two now, but oh how we had to throw every thing on a credit card to make ends meet. To top that my husband had a divorce where he was racked over the coals, got all the bills (they have no children), and he had to pay $600 a month in alimony. Which only got us further in debt. Putting groceries, medicine, gas on credit cards. We now have enough funds to pay credit card bill and maintenance bills, but no way to pay them down. HELP, please. Joy

How can we get out of credit card debt and not hurt our credit?


Dear Joy,

It seems to me that his desire to protect the credit over the family and children is a misplaced priority. He needs your help to shuffle priorities and get things back in order again. Maybe you can help him to see that living for a “good credit score” is simply placing a big strain on your relationship, the kids, and the financial safety of the family.

It does not sound like you have any savings or in a position to save. So what’s his game plan when an unexpected expense lands on your doorstep? Without any savings it will land back on credit and the balances will continue to rise and you will never get out.

Credit be damned, this situation is about fixing tomorrow, not yesterday. The first step would be to seek help from a credit counseling group and see if a debt management plan makes sense. If the monthly payment in a debt management plan does not give you any room to start saving money each month then you need to strongly consider bankruptcy. You can click here to find a local bankruptcy attorney.

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It’s time to put the family and kids first and maybe you can help him see that before it’s too late. I’d much rather see him embark on a journey to get this debt under control by participating in seeking good solutions than forced into a plan of action because you are in collections and getting sued.

Right now you are one blown engine away from a financial disaster. Take action now, please.

Please update me on your progress by posting updates here in the comments section of your question. I’m very interested in how this works out for you.


You are not alone. I'm here to help. There is no need to suffer in silence. We can get through this. Tomorrow can be better than today. Don't give up.

About the author

Steve Rhode

Steve Rhode is the Get Out of Debt Guy and has been helping good people with bad debt problems since 1994. You can learn more about Steve, here.

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