My Husband is an Army Recruiting Commander and We Can’t Afford Our Bills. – Enisha

“Dear Steve,

We desperately need help. We have 3 children in our home (total of 5). We are in financial ruin.

So much so that it has prevented my husband from getting a promotion. He is currently a Recruiting Station Commander in the Army. We have sacrificed and moved a few times to help progress his career and now because of our money problems he will not be able to take the job.

We are beyond living paycheck to paycheck, I have taken out Payday loans and we have defaulted on them, all of our credit cards are maxed out, we have a personal loan. It is really bad. We get so many calls from bill collectors that we just want to turn off the phone.

What makes it even worse is I don’t think that it is an issue of us not making enough money. It is really an issue mismanagement. Please help us. My husband is an amazing man who has served his county and he deserves a better life.


Dear Enisha,

It sounds to me that you are so buried in debt that a payoff approach is probably not realistic.

While some may be harsh on you for getting into this position, the reality is you’ve probably learned so much about what not to do that all you need is a fresh start or a second chance and you’ll do better.

Active duty military personnel are often hesitant or afraid about pursuing legal options like bankruptcy to deal with their debts for fear it will hurt their security clearance. The reality is that the clearance is hurt more by being in financial trouble. In fact you can read this to learn more about the Army and bankruptcy.

While it certainly sounds like bankruptcy is the fresh start you need, you can use the free How to Get Out of Debt Calculator to review your options.

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The bottom line at this point is if you want to spend the next five years struggling and dodging collectors and possibly getting sued, or spend the next year rebuilding your credit and doing better moving forward. Which choice make sense to you?

Please post your responses and follow-up messages to me on this in the comments section below.


You are not alone. I'm here to help. There is no need to suffer in silence. We can get through this. Tomorrow can be better than today. Don't give up.

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Steve Rhode is the Get Out of Debt Guy and has been helping good people with bad debt problems since 1994. You can learn more about Steve, here.
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