Janet is Fighting Dark Depression, Debt, Disability and Despair

“Dear Steve,

I am 66 married hubby is 55 & on disability – I have been fighting depression all my life – I work part time but hours are being cut – company may go under – no jobs out there for the elderly – we are $105,000.00 in debt of cc & loan- can’t pay them anymore – tried calling the cc & loan for a better repayment plan they were no help – seeing a lawyer about bankruptcy – I am getting calls fron a 800 # but when I answer no one is there so I hang up – I presume it is from the loan company – why can’t they just be on the other end – I will answer even though it does no good.

I am paying some of these bills even though it is a hardship should I just quit paying them all? Also should I tell them when they do call that I will be filing for bankruptcy?

I love your site & thank you for being such a caring person in this time of need


Dear Janet,

I am so sorry that you are dealing with all of these issues. I guess I’ll have to fall back on my motto that gets me through these dark days, “At least you’re not on fire.”

I feel strongly that we need to tackle this in a bit of a reverse order. The financial issue is a symptom of a greater money troubles and yes, it can be address through bankruptcy. Click here for bankruptcy information.

But at the same time I think you need to focus on getting your depression under control. Depression and debt are not good friends. Living with active depression leaves you unable to properly deal with the strong emotional hurdles in your way that need your vigor and drive to get through.

For example, when you go bankrupt you are best served by embracing the task and working quickly to get all the necessary documentation to the attorney to file your bankruptcy papers. If you are suffering with the effects of depression it is hard to muster the energy to focus on the task of gathering documents or even getting it to the attorney.

If you are not under treatment for your depression I really want you to go and speak to your medical professional about how you are feeling. Depression can be placed under control with non-addictive medication and or talk therapy. For more information on depression please read this detailed publication National Institute of Mental Health – Depression

Symptoms of Depression

  • Persistent sad, anxious or “empty” feelings
  • Feelings of hopelessness and/or pessimism
  • Feelings of guilt, worthlessness and/or helplessness
  • Irritability, restlessness
  • Loss of interest in activities or hobbies once pleasurable, including sex
  • Fatigue and decreased energy
  • Difficulty concentrating, remembering details and making decisions
  • Insomnia, early-morning wakefulness, or excessive sleeping
  • Overeating, or appetite loss
  • Thoughts of suicide, suicide attempts
  • Persistent aches or pains, headaches, cramps or digestive problems that do not ease even with treatment

As you can see those issues related to untreated depression are not conducive to helping you to deal with the financial trauma or moving forward with your life.

The calls you are getting sound like they are coming for a computer autodial system that automatically connects a debt collector with the next call when they have finished with the last. Sometimes the computer will dial the call and once it is answered, then connect it with the next available collector. It sounds like the nothingness you are hearing is that time lag between when you answer and when a human picks up.

If you do speak to a human you can tell them you are filing bankruptcy if you want, doesn’t hurt.

It does not make sense to continue to send any more payments to your creditors that will be included in your bankruptcy but you should coordinate which payments to stop with your bankruptcy attorney. They will be happy to advise you about this.

The sooner with meet with your bankruptcy attorney and get that process moving forward, the sooner the collection calls will cease and your debt will be put behind you so you can focus on living on what you are earning today rather than struggling to make yesterday’s ends meet with a salary based on the working conditions from tomorrow.


You are not alone. I'm here to help. There is no need to suffer in silence. We can get through this. Tomorrow can be better than today. Don't give up.
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2 thoughts on “Janet is Fighting Dark Depression, Debt, Disability and Despair”

  1. It certainly is a Catch-22 situation. Which do you tackle first, the underlying depression that is leading to inaction or the underlying debt which is often causing the depression.

    I often find that in these dark circumstances that the ability for people to take charge and fight back is greatly diminished and the emotional need to is eliminate the negative stressors that can be eliminated to focus on getting better.

    I’m very interested in what advice you give to specifically help someone, who can’t already deal with the situation or cope to suddenly be able to do that and take charge?


  2. There is so much a consumer should know before paying a collection agency or filing BK. The consumer in debt has rights and the collector violates those rights, every day! If a consumer wants to pay less than a dime a dollar they must learn all the debt collection secerets on how the debt collector uses unfair tactics to manipulate and intimidate them into paying a debt. The consumer must learn how to protect themselves and their privacy, clean up their credit report and save them hundreds and thousands of dollars through negotiation.

    If you speak with a BK attorney he will no doubt tell you BK is the only option and is right for you. Watch out for this ill advice that is the last thing you need in a depressive situation like this.


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