My Wife Won’t Help Me to Get Out of Debt. – Chad

“Dear Steve,

I am married and my wife and I have seperated our money to where we both put in the same amount of money per month that equals our house bills and the rest is ours. I have fell into debt over my head using the extra money I USED TO HAVE.

My wife doesn’t want to take out a second mortgage to settle MY debt so I am just stuck getting further and further behind. I can only afford to pay the minimum payment and I want someone to negotiate with my lenders so that I can get this stuff paid off. Please help!

How can I reduce my payments and still get the stuff paid off in a short amount of time without consolidation or taking out a second mortgage (that my wife is against)?


Dear Chad,

I am assuming that since you manage your money like strangers that the debt you are in trouble with is in your name alone.

Now I’ve never been a fan of this is mine and that is yours in a relationship but now that you are in this mess, what can we do?

For all I know you have a history of not managing your money or living within your allowance. In that case then your wife probably has a good reason to not want to take out a second mortgage to bail you out.

The problem with your situation is that if it gets so unmanageable for you that you can’t continue to pay, and you do hold a joint mortgage with some equity, then bankruptcy could be problematic for you.

You could investigate a debt management program where you would make one monthly payment each month. Click here for debt management information.

I feel there is more to this story than you are telling me. Please post an update in the comments.


You are not alone. I'm here to help. There is no need to suffer in silence. We can get through this. Tomorrow can be better than today. Don't give up.
Steve Rhode
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