You see, he’s just living through the detox of bad debt right now. He feels like a loser, a screw-up, and a failure. The depression of being in debt has got him in a bear lock. He’s so buried in the eight stages of debt and financial death that any light at the end of the tunnel is masked.
It might not sound comforting right now but here are some honest observations from someone that has been in the financial crapper myself.
- You F’ed up. It is what it is.
- Your debt appears to have been related to a gambling personality, maybe adrenaline junky?
- If you aren’t careful, your business will follow your “need for speed.” A flurry of initial activity but disappointing results.
- Getting out of debt doesn’t work the same way. It’s not fun, not glamour’s, and certainly not exciting in the right ways. I never met a debt groupie yet.
- The best thing for your soul at the moment would be to distill life down to the basic components and once you find a stable foundation, rebuild from there. This means seeking friends out, ridding yourself of as many obligations as you can in your personal and business life, and focus on doing a few things well.
- You need a chance to recover. You’ve been through a difficult journey so far, and nobody is immune to the depression that can accompany debt.
I’m not being sarcastic here. A hug can work wonders from someone that can appreciate all you’ve been through and what is yet to come. I wish I was there to give him that hug.
The best thing that can happen to someone in a similar position do right now is to think about the following plan of action:
- Consider bankruptcy – If you have not talked to a bankruptcy lawyer yet, you should. If you need to find a local bankruptcy lawyer, you can here.
- Ask yourself if you have a greater need to repair your past or repair your future. If you want to make amends for the past, it will take years of hard work and sacrifice into the future. However, many people sacrifice a safe future with a sturdy roof, trying to apologize for their past financial failures. It might be better to go bankrupt and start over.
- Don’t waste a perfectly good failure. Learn from this financial mess, and don’t do that stuff that got you in trouble again.
- Slow down your business life and focus on doing one thing well and build on that success. You need more success in your life right now, not more opportunity to fail.
There is good news in a disaster because it can be a tremendous learning event. Fundamental change comes from big situations.
You are not alone. I'm here to help. There is no need to suffer in silence. We can get through this. Tomorrow can be better than today. Don't give up.
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