Quick Answer: A reader forgot he had submitted a personal question for online publication and was shocked to discover his story publicly posted three months later. The advice columnist reassured him that submissions are anonymous with only email addresses visible, so his identity remains protected from other readers.
Question:
Dear Steve,
HOLY CRAP! As I usually do, I am reading your commentary, and some things are jumping at me. I am thinking, “Gee, this guy has some of the same problems I have! That’s weird. As I go on, more and more of this sounds awfully familiar. Then it dawns on me…SHIT! THIS IS ME!
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I had completely forgotten that I had written anything and, worse, given my approval to publish it. So all I really can say is, THERE IS A HUGE CHANGE IN SEEING SOMETHING YOU HAVE WRITTEN, NOT THINKING THAT IT COULD OR WOULD EVER GET PUBLISHED ONLINE, BUT INDEED SEEING IT AVAILABLE TO ANYONE/EVERYONE WHO READS YOUR WEBSITE! It’s worse than forgetting to pull up my fly after taking a pee and walking around unaware until someone discreetly lets me know that my fly is open.
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I suppose it’s a little too late to retract my permission to have it published, as I included more details than I intended!
Do you know anyone who can give me a new identity, complete with different fingerprints and mug shots, as well as a fictionalized biography, so I can deny that I had anything to do with the submission?
Bob
Answer:
Dear Bob,
I think you are talking about this question I received and answered three months ago.
You sent me a question for me to answer on the website. I spent a lot of time researching the answer for you, and the answer can help others in the same situation.
Thank you for reaching out to me for assistance.
I don’t even know who you are, except for an email address. So how would anyone else ever know who the person is that sent me the question?
When I published the answer in June, I notified you through the comments and subscribed you to be notified of future comments.
Plus, there is the issue that you are now concerned about three months later: the details you provided to be published are too much. It’s a bit like calling into a televised helpline and then wanting to retract your call after it airs.
Unfortunately, the internet is a big place with the memory of an elephant. I don’t know all the places that might have scrapped this content or republished it.
But here is what I did for you. I went back and changed the dates you gave me in your question and changed your name. I can’t control where the original question might have appeared elsewhere.
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Left message of regret.
Answered message of regret.