My Parents Were Terrible at Managing Money. Now I Am as Well. – Kassandra

“Dear Steve,

25 year old newlywed with 16month old child, stay at home mom.

Got a job working for a great company at 18, Whole Foods, was making okay money and living at home.

Applied for credit cards at about 19 because every store and bank was offering one and I was young and dumb and was never given any financial advise or guidance, and was really naive about how credit cards worked.

Accrued 4 credit cards with ranging credit limits ($500-$1500) and max them all out.

Was making montly payments until I left my job because I wanted to focus on my education and not work full time; meanwhile, the interest rates on my cards where going up, late fees where piling up and the cards that where under my credit limit where rapidly surpassing those limits with all the fees.

Completely overwhelmed I spoke with my parents, who had credit problems of there own, especially since the market crashed on 07 (they ownreal estate in the Bay Area SF and Oakland, purchased a building for $649,000 which was then valued at $333,000 in ’11, and they are having trouble refinancing) needless to say, didn’t grow up with financially savy or stable parents.

They told me that if I ignored it, after 7 years it would disappear. So here I am, 6 years, almost 7 years later with a family and I am still getting harassed. I need to get things together, for myself and family and want to take responsibility for my stupid actions, this has been a heavy heavy weight on my shoulders.

My husband and I live paycheck to paycheck but desperately want to mend our situation and fulfill our promises to ourselves and growing family to get on track and be financially stable and smart people for us and our son.(My husband was in a motorcycle accident at 22, broke both legs, fractured his femur and had a hospital stay for 2 weeks $150,000+ of damage, would have qualified for medi-cal as he grew up on welfare and his mother has mental illness and couldn’t help him file the paperwork in time, he too was young and dumb, he is now 30)

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Can I consolidate my debt? Where do I start? We will be getting our tax returns and I would like to offer to pay my creditors a “lump sum” and get on with our lives. Will it help my credit score?


debt hole law tada

Dear Kassandra,

Yea, don’t go back to that parent again for financial advice. That was horrible advice.

Considering how much debt you have and the fact you are living paycheck to paycheck I don’t think any extended repayment plan makes sense unless you are expecting a substantial increase in income or reduction in expenses.

It seems on face value the more logical option is to consider bankruptcy as a way to get a fresh start and second chance in 90 days or less.

You can click here to find a local bankruptcy attorney and talk to them for free about your specific situation. Get the facts and then you can make an informed and educated decision if bankruptcy is right for you.

Please post your responses and follow-up messages to me on this in the comments section below.


You are not alone. I'm here to help. There is no need to suffer in silence. We can get through this. Tomorrow can be better than today. Don't give up.
Damon Day - Pro Debt Coach

1 thought on “My Parents Were Terrible at Managing Money. Now I Am as Well. – Kassandra”

  1. I have to admit to being stunned to see you were told to just wait 7 years and it would disappear. Wow. I was in a similar debt situation when I filed for bankruptcy many years ago. It was a hard decision, but one of the best I could have made. It’s not shameful to admit you’ve made mistakes and take advantage of the processes put in place to help you!


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