I’m Scared, Engaged, Pregnant and Terrified. – Alex

“Dear Steve,

I got married in Sept 201 and unfortunately he ended up being the wrong person and abusive. I am still in the process of getting divorced. I racked up around 30k in credit card debt from the wedding and now for paying household and dily expenses on one income. I am living in the house which is still in both our names and paying for everything. I’m in a hardship program with Wells Fargo and they lowered my mortgage from 1448 to 558 a month, and I pay for the car that is in both of our names, 402 a month. And now I am engaged and preganant and terrified.

I am desperate for answers!! How can I get a consolidation loan to pay off all my credit card debt and my car loan? Every where I have tried so far turns me down. My credit scores are 683 on experian and transunion and 601 on equifax.


Sleepless woman

Dear Alex,

First of all, I’m so sorry you’ve had to live through this.

Let’s deal with this past financial abuse and move forward so you can focus on delivering a healthy baby instead of stressing the poor child out before they get here.

If we had a lot of time and you were up for a fight it might be worth getting a copy of your consolidated credit report and then dealing with what is being reported about you. It would be academically interesting to figure out why the big difference between reports.

But based on your present situation today I don’t think that’s the best approach to resolving this situation.

Do You Have a Question You'd Like Help With? Contact Debt Coach Damon Day. Click here to reach Damon.

I would suspect that your credit history indicates you are either maxed out and/or having a hardship. That’s the worst time to try to get a loan. You see, the higher the risk is for the lender, the less likely they are to give you a loan.

But we have to start thinking about the ties to the past abusive relationship through the debt and the fact you are currently pregnant.

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Based on those two factors it would make reasonable and logical sense for you to cut ties and reduce your stress. This means the first recommendation would be for you to consider bankruptcy and start your life over with a new relationship, a new baby, and a new financial life.

My vote is you start over and pursue happiness. Put the past behind you and think about what is best for that child in your tummy.

You can click here to find a local bankruptcy attorney and talk to them for free.

Please post your responses and follow-up messages to me on this in the comments section below.

Damon Day - Pro Debt Coach

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Steve Rhode is the Get Out of Debt Guy and has been helping good people with bad debt problems since 1994. You can learn more about Steve, here.
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